in heat

I have recently come to the realization that there may be another type of submissive frenzy that really isn’t a total frenzy because it isn’t just a girl needing to submit, needing to find One. It’s often, in fact, i think more kin to happen to girls who are already in a relationship whether [...]

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Dumbified.

So i attempted some role play. I didn’t take ju out, but took an alt out, just to see if being a nobody would help me feel more like a kajira, and well… be a nobody. It lasted roughly 4 days. I entered a town i was advised was good for RP. [...]

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Flashes…

Recently, i was told that one of the differences in determining if someone is a sociopath or not, is their ability as adults to admit wrong doings.  It was told to me in the context of explaining adolescence.  A teenager never says they are sorry.  Having raised one (or partly) i can attest that getting [...]

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Click to edit terain

I am officially frustrated. But, i’m almost done. It has taken me… three days i think (it’s all a blur) to repair the damage done when the items poofed from my sim. Meant to hurt me, it sure worked.
I have now been unable to design for over a month. [...]

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:) One final rant

i am out of it.
No more abuse. No more lies. No more pretending to agree when i don’t.
No more listening to how good someone is when you’ve seen the opposite.
Nothing is the same as when i came, and nothing could ever have been again. Made sure of that one.
i wish noone ill [...]

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.meh.

i hate having regrets.
i hate feeling so freaking stuck.
i hate that i can’t just play the stupid game and do something sneaky.
i hate that i’m stuck with no good option no matter where i look.
and i despise the fact i believed what i heard.
All of these things of course can be made positive, but i’m [...]

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Night terrors.

i wrote a private blog post.
sleep will return to me again at some point.
About my night terrors.
And how much i hate myself right now.
i don’t think it should be read by anyone.
this hurting, it’s gotta end at some point.
i am doing the right thing. i am doing what’s best for those i care for.
i [...]

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Two Dances.

*she sat, and lifted her chin, her eyes moving to the three moons. She felt physically ill. Her eyes stung from the tears she’d shed, and her heart, it felt as if it no longer had a place inside her chest but still she breathed*
*she plucked a stalk of grass, and entwined it around [...]

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Dance of the forgotten one.

She looked at him, timidly, pleadingly, so quickly, but searching for so much. Just as fast her eyes, deep pools that revealed every ache and thrill within her lowered. Her thoughts hidden, sheltered, from the simple glance he cast her way. Strands of gold, thick and silky fell forward, framing her [...]

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It’s that Feeling

Oh what a feeling it can be!
I haven’t felt this since mid January.
i have to admit, at that point it was much much more intense. And it was wonderful.
When it fades it’s not something i really know that i miss. But, when it’s back i realize how good i am when [...]

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